Sweet Child O' Mine
by TwentyThree.On.August.The.12th
Summary: It's everything at once for Bellatrix as she begins preparation for her NEWTS:she's fighting with her boyfriend, her sisters are driving her mad, and oh yeah...she's pregnant at 16. How will she deal when she must uphold the name of Black?
1. Prologue

**A/N: Okay, Hello there readers. I've had this idea floating around in my mind for quite some time now, so here it is. Basically, its the stereotypical teenage pregnancy, but this being a Bellatrix story, things are bound to get crazy. I wanted to write a story set in Bellatrix's school days and for some reason, I was pulled in this direction. I don't know if it was pure curiosity: "Hmm...I wonder what Bella would do..." or if popular culture has finally gotten a hold of my mind. Anyways read and review, please. I just want to know if this was a good idea or not. Thanks. Yes the title is from a Guns' n' Roses song. No relation though. **

**Disclaimer: Of course I don't own anything. **

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Sweet Child O' Mine

Prologue:

_The cashier eyed the strangely dressed, black headed little girl suspiciously. Well, she wasn't quite a little girl, but much younger in years than most who ventured into his pharmacy. He watched as she fiddled with a box on the shelves in the back. He looked up at the isle sign noticing she was in the feminine care section of the pharmacy. She seemed both nervous and disgusted as she approached the high leveled counter, box in hand._

_"Is this one of those muggle things to see if you are with child?" The young woman asked._

_"Muggle?" The cashier responded confused. "With child, how old are you my dear?"_

_"Yes, did I stutter, muggle? And I am one hundred percent positive that my age is none of your business. Fine, don't answer my question." She threw three gold galleons on the counter and stared at the man perplexed by what she perceived to be his idiocy._

_"My dear child, where did you get this?" The man questioned fingering the gold pieces and holding one up._

_"Is it not enough, honestly? Why did I even come here? I should've known better. Muggles are disgusting and redundant. For Merlin's sake; no one must ever know about this." She grimaced throwing another gold piece onto the counter, snatching the box, tucking it into the sleeve of her cloak, and walking out._


	2. Late

**Late **

Bellatrix bounded through her house doors and to the stairs leading to her dorm, her youngest sister, Narcissa at her heals.

"Bella, where did you go earlier? You know you aren't supposed to go off school grounds. You can't get into trouble again. Professor Dumble…" The blonde child continued as she skipped up the steps, running after her older sister. Narcissa was twelve, four years Bella's junior.

"If you don't leave me alone, Cissy, I will hex you into next century. Do you understand." Bellatrix growled spinning on her heels, and staring down at her little sister. It was a statement rather than question. "I don't care what that old fool, Dumbledore says; hear me?" She raised an eyebrow, giving her sister a warning look.

Narcissa took a step down as she stared at her older sister, determining if she'd follow through with the hex or not.

"I've done it, and I will do it again. Just ask Andy." Bellatrix's voice interceded into Narcissa's thoughts, as Cissy determined the value of truth to them. Andy was Narcissa's older sister and Bellatrix younger.

Bella was the oldest of the three Black girls, their ages ranging from 16, 14, and 12; each in a different year at Hogwarts. Bella was a sixth year student and excelled at potions, Andy a fourth year, her specialty transfiguration, and Narcissa a second year, her specialty herbology.

"But, Bella…" Young Narcissa began to whine.

Quickly losing patience, Bellatrix raised an eyebrow at her little sister and began to reach for her wand, making sure not to jostle her cloak too much.

"Fine, I'm going, but I won't go quietly, meanie." Narcissa pouted, frowned, and turned on her toes heading back down the stairs she had just ran up.

Bellatrix scoffed in frustration as she turned around and continued up the remaining steps to her room. She stormed over to her bed, closing the curtains around her, ignoring everyone else, she hoped on to her bed folding her legs, placing the box on her lap. Quietly, she pulled the muggle made box from her cloak sleeve and turned it over in her hands. The box was made out of pink cardboard, a slogan reading "Welcome baby," greeted her as she thumbed the box.

"No, not welcome baby…" Bella grimaced in a whisper as she coaxed the box open with her wand, calling for the directions. She held the directions in mid air with her wand, reading them.

"I have to pee on this stick…what the hell. Muggles are by far the worst creatures to ever roam the planet…this is far beyond barbaric. "She groaned in her head as her black eyes darted across the directions once more. "TWO HOURS!" She scoffed in horror as she read the final words on the paper.

"Are you okay in there, Bellatrix?" She could hear a voice call out to her, it was Alexandra Nott, a fellow sixth year.

"Mind your own business Nott. I'm just fine." Bella spat back, mumbling obscenities under her breath. No reply sounded. She grimaced again as she reread the directions; it would take two hours for the test to complete. She bit down on her bottom lip, ready to break something, as she drew blood. Footsteps and voices could be heard as she scrambled to hide her belonging.

"Bella!" She could hear the voice of Andromeda call out. She stuffed the package under her pillow and leaned back, as her curtains flew open.

"Andy, what do you think you are doing!" She interjected as her curtains flew open. "What if I had been dressing?"

"Then you would've been dressing, all of us are girls in her, unless you've managed to sneak Rod up here. Is that why you told Cissy you were going to curse her?" Andromeda demanded, raising an eyebrow and placing her hands on her hips.

"Rod is not here." Her mind floated back to the contraband muggle product under her pillow. Rod was Bellatrix's boyfriend, a seventh year Slytherin and captain of the Quidditch team. "AND—I didn't tell the _baby_ I was going to curse her, I said hex…"

"Same thing."

"Whatever. Now, what do _you_ want?" Bellatrix demanded, her patience wearing thin once again.

"I wanted to know why you've been so evil, well even more unpleasant lately. Cissy is down stairs crying." Andromeda sighed, sitting down on the edge of Bella's bed and laying across it. Her brown curls hung off the edge of the bed as she flipped her hair forward.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Andy. Seriously. I just wanted to be left alone. Is it not enough that she is with me every minute of the day? Why can't I just come up to my room alone?" Bellatrix whined, leaning back against her head board, careful not to lie against her pillow. "Now, please, let me be."

"Fine then. I'm going down to dinner. Are you coming? Tonight we're having pumpkin juice with dinner, your favorite. Maybe that will put you in a better mood."

"Pumpkin Juice?" Her face scrunched up at the mere mention, her stomach flipped. Usually it was the thing she enjoyed most about dinner time. Once she had drunk so much pumpkin juice she had turned orange. At this moment however, her stomach turned as she thought about the orange liquid sloshing around in its goblet.

"What now?" Andromeda questioned, rolling her eyes as she stood up. The disposition on Bellatrix's face perplexed her.

"Nothing, I'll be down there in a minute. Now please." Bella's black curls bounced as she waved a hand dismissing her sister. Andromeda walked out, muttering something about 'wicked witch, and PMS' under her breath as she did so.

"PMS," Bella thought to herself, "I wish it was…" she trailed off in her head, standing and ripping her curtains closed again.

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**A/N: So what cha think?**


	3. Pumpkin Juice

**Pumpkin Juice**

Twenty minutes later, after the last of her roommates had left the dorm, Bella pulled the box out from her pillow and held it in her hands. She read the words on the box once again, pausing after each glance across the word "baby."

_Merlin's sake. _Bella hissed aloud to no one in particular. "I'm such an imbecile. God!" She screamed throwing herself face down on to her bed, the box landing next to her. She screamed at the top of her lungs until her voice began to break.

"No, I can't be. Please. Not. Me." She groaned turning over on her back. Her dark curls cascaded down her shoulders as she stared up at the ceiling. She counted the stars of the enchanted ceiling, trying aimlessly to calm her nerves. The box slipped forward, shifting from the sudden weight changes. She could see it out of the corner of her eye; the bright pink color souring her stomach as the thought of pumpkin juice had.

Bella just wanted everything and everyone to go away as she clamped her eyes shut. She knew it would only be a matter of time before she'd have to take the test. What she'd do after the test was a whole different story. Certainly, she could not let anyone know. She was a Black—Black's did not make mistakes, especially the one she just had. Surely, what would her parents do if they had found out? Rod would be a dead man once, Cygnus, received word of an impending grandchild from his sixteen year old daughter. Yes, the kid would be a pureblood child, but what about her family image. Her family would be scorned and shamed from society. Bellatrix could always quit school and marry Rod, but that was not in her. Marriage was something Bella was not a fan of; it made you weak. She could not imagine submitting herself fully to a man as her mother did every day.

She could feel the back of her throat burn as tears fought to form in her eyes. How could she have been so stupid…?

"Bella," A soft voice called from the other side of the curtains.

She shot up, pushing the tears away, and throwing the test under the pillow; angry at herself again for not being alert.

"What! What do I have to do to be alone around here?" She sounded, watching as the outline of a small girl with thick curls backed away from the curtains.

"Cissy, I'm sorry. Please…don't go cry. I'm sorry. What is it?" She sighed. She hadn't meant to lose her temper with her little sister so much; it was just easy to do.

"She's making fun of me." Cissy whispered from the other side of the curtains. "I just want her to stop. She keeps calling me names."

"WHO?" Bella demanded, standing and opening the curtains after making sure her secret was hidden. No one, absolutely no one picked on her sisters.

"Rita Skeeter. She keeps calling me dumb, and pipsqueak. She called me a cry baby in the common room earlier. She told me I was too stupid to know what I was crying about." Narcissa folded her arms angrily, pouting.

"She said this to you? No one, come on Cissy…" Bellatrix broke off mid sentence, grabbing her sister's hand and taking her wand in another. "She's not getting away with this. No one insults my little sister. Where's Andy?"

"Andy's already at dinner. I was waiting for you to apologize for disturbing you." Cissy stuttered, as she fought to keep up with Bellatrix's pace.

They walked galloped the rest of the way to the great hall.

Bella's eyes immediately searched the Slytherin table for Rita when they reached the inside of the hall, as her ears listened for her annoying voice.

Bingo.

"Come Cissy." Bella demanded as she walked over to the table, standing in front of Rita, whose mouth was going a mile a minute.

"Rita, who do you think you are?" Bella's voice was cold and harsh. Her question wasn't really a question more of a rhetorical statement.

"Hello, Bellatrix." Rita smirked, lowering her glasses and setting down her parchment and quill. Rita Skeeter never went anywhere without her "writing utensils" she like to think of herself as a journalist. More like a gossip columnist if you asked any of her fellow peers. "Who are you?"

"You damn well now why I'm here. Where do you get off calling my sister a cry baby you talentless twit." She dropped Cissy's hand and set both of her hands down on the table top. She could smell something that was making her stomach turn. Her fingers drummed along the wood as she tried to push the nausea feeling from her mind.

"Well, she is. I've never seen anyone cry more. She's always crying. I just call them how I see them."

"I can tell you what I will call you if you ever say anything to either one of my sisters again…"

"Oh, you count the mudblood lover as your sister too?" Rita raised an eyebrow, tilting her head. "Or are they just study buddies?" Rita questioned referring to Andromeda's study partner, a fourth year Hufflepuff, who was a mudblood. Rita's voice raised octaves, she knew a crowd was starting to gather and watch—which she loved.

If she could get away with challenge the hot tempered Bellatrix, everyone would know her name.

"Don't say anything about my sisters." Bella growled, she reached into her cloak pockets pulling her wand, raising it and shouting, stupefy, before anyone had a chance to stop her. Rita flew back from the bench landing on her back, the onlookers all bursting out in laughter. Bella had a bad temper, almost everyone knew this.

Purposefully trying to get a rise out of Bellatrix, not a smart move.

"Say something else, and next time I won't stun you. I'll rip you from each limb." Bellatrix threatened, her hands on her hips as she watched Rita motionless.

"MS. BLACK!" The high shrill voice of Professor McGonagall, head of Gryffindor, shouted from across the room. McGonagall had been on her way out of the great hall when she watched the scene unfold.

Bellatrix, Narcissa, and Andromeda—who had joined her sisters after hearing Rita refer to her—all turned to face her at the mention of their monikers.

"Bellatrix Black!" McGonagall proclaimed noticing all the girls' heads turn. "What do you think you are doing, we do not use our wands against other students!"

"She called my sisters out of their names, she deserved what she got." Bella snapped back, folding her arms across her chest and standing to face the professor in front of her. She was unapologetic.

"200 pts from Slytherin!"

"TWO HUNDRED POINTS! Are You Batty, seriously I didn't even hurt--,"Bella began, but before she could finish her thought someone stopped her. The nausea feeling began to seep back into her smell as she turned to look back at Rita, who was getting help to stand.

Rita looked up, eyes flashing with anger.

"Bellatrix…" Another voice, one belonging to Professor Slughorn, head of Slytherin, interceded into the conversation. "Minerva, I shall deal with this. Detention Bella, cleaning potion bottles, understand?"

"Yes, Professor." Bella did not fight him. Detention with Slughorn was better than being in the presence of a Gryffindor.

"One day of detention, honestly, she stunned me!" Rita groaned, rubbing her head.

"And I'll do it again if you keep that mouth running!" Bellatrix started, she turned back towards Rita, wand ready; ignoring the queasy feeling in her stomach.

The smell was getting closer to her now and she didn't think she could keep the vomit down. She looked down seeing the culprit, pumpkin juice.

"Then do it!" Rita hissed, pushing Bella's buttons on purpose, but before Bella had a chance to respond she felt a pair of arms, pick her up and drag her out of the great hall, the arms belonged to Rodolphus Lestrange.

Bella shouted the whole way out, "_this is not over_."

"Rod, put me down now!" She screamed trying to wiggle free from his grasp.

"Not until you calm down." He spoke, his grip loosening around her waist as he felt her calm.

"I am calm, now…" He set her down before she had time to finish her sentence. "But I will get her."

"Bella!" She could hear behind her and she saw her sisters running in her direction. Narcissa looked worried along with Andromeda.

The smell was even more evident now as she looked over Cissy's head and into the ruckus occurring because of her. Both of her sisters had been drinking the juice. The smell was making her sick to her stomach.

"Bella, mum and dad will be getting a letter because of this outburst. You're lucky Rod got in there when he did." Andromeda sputtered, out of breath from running to catch up with them. "If you would've jinxed her gain, I'm sure you'd have been expelled."

"I don't care. I hate her. She pisses me off and deserves what she gets." Bella groaned, scrunching her face. She could feel Rod's hands resting on her hips (in hopes of catching her in case she decided to attack again), which at that moment made her uncomfortable. They were so close to her stomach—her stomach…she had almost forgotten, but the smell…

Her stomach lurched forward and her hands flew to her mouth, she pulled away from Rod and took off running for the girls' lavatory.

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**A/N: Okay, I know it's going a little slow, but at this moment, this is all I can offer. I can't really kick anything awesome off because I have three papers to do for school. Actually, I shouldn't even be doing this, but I need a distraction. Anyway, enjoy. Look for Bella to take the test really soon.**


	4. Just Fine

**A/N: Hi everyone. I hope you like the update, although it is short. I've been busy lately and finally, I am free. So I will hopefully be updating regularly and the chapters will be longer as well. For all those out there who are reading my other story, I will be updating that one soon! Promise. Right now, I'm just going where the creativity calls me. Enjoy. **

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Just Fine

Bella felt as if her insides where being ripped apart as she hunched over the porcelain bowl. She was clammy, cold, and sweating profusely. Her hands were shaking as she sank to the ground and pulled her knees to her stomach, attempting to stop the nausea feeling.

_Please no. Anything but this, anything, no. _She repeated over and over in her head_. I won't cry, I won't. Nothing's wrong; this is not happening. I'll take the test and everything will be fine. It will prove that I am just being paranoid. That's all. It will. It has too. _She sighed and pushed away intruding tears as she leaned against the stall. The wood was cool against her hot skin as she wiped at her eyes.

"Bells, are you okay?" The light voice of Andromeda called out to her. Where the bathroom stall door sat above the floor, Bellatrix could see two sets of legs; both wore black Mary Janes and knee high black socks.

"I'm fine Andromeda. Just under the weather. You don't need to worry about me. I am not a child!" Bellatrix snapped back as she pushed herself against the stall, inched her way onto her feet, and swung the stall door open. The anxious and awaiting faces of her little sisters met her gaze as she did so.

"You know, you don't have to be a bitch constantly." Retorted Andromeda as she folded her arms across her chest, and rolled her eyes. Andromeda and Bellatrix looked the most alike out of the three sisters; each shared the distinct Black features, but Bella's eyes and hair were on the darker side.

"And you don't have to worry about me constantly. I am the oldest you know." Bellatrix spewed; mimicking Andromeda's defensive position.

"Well, you think it'd kill you to act like it?" Andromeda raised an eyebrow and Bellatrix rolled her eyes.

"Bells," Narcissa interceded; noticing the tension. "Are you okay? I'm sorry you got detention because of me."

"Cissy, it's okay. I would've eventually got it on my own. All you did was speed the process up. Plus, someone needs to teach, Rita, that her mouth is going to get her hurt. I'm just glad I had the opportunity to do it."

"So you are done trying to teach her a lesson then?" Cissy asked referring to Bella's earlier comments to Rita.

Bellatrix shrugged her shoulders and walked away from her sisters towards the sinks, turning the spout on and rinsing her mouth with water.

"You're going to get expelled if you attack her again." Andromeda growled turning around to face Bella. Bellatrix looked up seeing Andy's reflection in the mirror beside her own.

"I didn't attack her the first time. Not my fault she's weak."

"Not everyone is aggressive as you."

"She insulted you both. You, using that filthy mudblood you help out of pity. I was just defending my family."

"Maybe I don't want to be defended?" Andromeda spoke her voice stiff and hard. Her eyes locked onto the reflection of Bella's eyes in the mirror. The room was silent for a moment.

"Bella, don't do it again. Please." Cissy whispered; the first to break the silence.

"Don't worry Narcissa. I won't do it again. I have more important things to worry about." Bellatrix sighed as she broke gaze with Andromeda and looked down at her stomach quickly and the turned around; a smile playing on her face as she looked at Cissy. "I swear. Cross my heart." She pulled her wand from her robe pocket and drew a pink cross over her heart. "Now I have something I have to take care of."

"You have detention," Stated Andromeda, sighing and then following after Bellatrix as she walked out. Narcissa followed closely behind.

Bella walked out of the lavatory and towards the dungeons where the Slytherin dorms began. Both Narcissa and Andromeda had returned to dinner. She was almost at the portrait when she felt an arm grab her left wrist. She paused, reaching in her robes and pulling her wand.

"Geez, Trix. Calm down. It's just me." Rod called out to her as he pulled her close; his other hand taking her right hand and lowering her wand. "You're hot when you're paranoid." He leaned forward, bringing himself down to her height, and reached for her lips with his. Bella turned her head just before his lips reached hers and she could feel them brush against her cheek.

Rod looked down at her perplexed. Bella pushed away from him and turned back towards the portrait. She didn't feel right with him touching her, or her touching him, without knowing first if she was or was not pregnant, which made all the difference. She felt wrong and shameful: feelings she never had. Sixteen and pregnant would not look well on her family's record. If she was pregnant she'd have to figure out how and if she was going to tell Rodolphus, if she wasn't, no one ever needed to know about this incident.

"Are you mad at me, Bella?" Rod asked following closely behind her as she walked through the opening behind the portrait. "If this is about Rita, I am not apologizing for carrying you out of there. I know you Trix. You would've done a lot more than jinx her given the chance. Dumbledore is beginning to lose his patience with you."

"Dumbledore is an old fool; a spectacle wearing fool." She groaned as she neared the girls' dorms stairs. "And no I'm not mad at you. I just don't feel well. That's all. Okay?" She turned back towards him.

"Well, what's wrong then?" He questioned concerned.

_I think I'm pregnant. _The words were on the tip of her tongue, but she could not bring herself to say them. Saying them meant that there was a chance they would be true and she just could not take that chance. "It's nothing. I'm fine. Now, I have something to do."

"What do you have to do? You know you have detention with Slughorn."

"I know!" She growled, feeling frustrated and overwhelmed. All she wanted to do was go upstairs, take the muggle test, and go on about her way like nothing ever happened. "And it's none of your concern; I just have something I need to take care of. Now, if you don't mind, like I told Andromeda, I do not need a babysitter."

"I wasn't trying to be Trix. Look, just go do whatever you have to do and I'll wait down here and then I can walk you to detention."

"Rod, I've been there enough times to know where it's at. I don't need someone to walk me. Now, leave me alone!" She turned and stomped up the stairs, willing herself not to turn around. She hated being evil to Rod when he didn't deserve it, but she needed to figure out things for herself. This was her body, and her problem, no one else's.

***(I promise that Bella will take the test in the next chapter.) ***


	5. Taking Tests

**A/N: Hello! I see you're still reading! Thank you, I'm flattered and please do enjoy; and if you enjoy just drop a review. Oh, and: Okay, at first I hadn't planned on this being a complete Belladolphus, but now I am, which at first it won't seem like it, but bare with me. Anyways, like I always say:Enjoy**.

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**Taking Tests**

Bella bit down on her lip hard as she reached her bed. She looked around her the dorm room, which she shared with three other girls in her year, making sure everyone else was still at dinner. She had detention with Slughorn after the meal, which meant she had only a short amount of time. The stupid test would need two hours to complete, just what Bella needed; two more hours to worry.

_Damn muggle products_. She scoffed sitting down on her bed and reaching under her pillow. Her only other option: going to see Madame Pomfrey, who would no doubt owl her parents; two people who she didn't even want to factor into the equation at the moment; especially since she knew not where she even stood.

Sighing, she pulled the box out and tilled it in her hands. Once again, she read and reread the directions; still off centered about having to pee on a stick. According to the pink box, of all colors Bellatrix detested pink was the worst, the test was guaranteed to be accurate. Bella scoffed after reading it. "Muggles, accurate? Not even mudbloods are." She shook her head and set the box back down on her bed. Paranoia, once again, caused Bella to glance around the room before she pulled her school robes off. If she was going to have detention—and take the most important test of her life, well by Merlin she was going to be comfortable to do so.

She unwound the green and silver stripped tie from around her neck, undid the top two buttons on her blouse; any more than that and she could surely have risked indecent exposure, and untucked her shirt from the skirt, which she dreaded having to wear every day. As she untucked the white blouse from her school skirt, she pulled the material up so that her mid-drift was exposed. With one hand still holding the shirt up, Bellatrix placed a shaky, delicate hand upon her stomach.

"Nothing _feels _different." She whispered looking down at her flat stomach. "So everything_ is _fine." She reassured; doubt creeping into her mind. It had been just about two months since her last period, which fell directly in-line with the Halloween party; the night that her and, Rod, could not keep their hands off one another; the night that they both had forgotten about the anti-conception charms, and the wiz proof condoms Rod had recently purchased.

From what her Aunt Walburga had told her, Bellatrix knew that after one missed period she should consider pregnancy possibility, but she refused to let her mind wander there; after all, she had just gotten her letters in regards to her NEWTS placements. She would be taking the high level NEWTS for potions, which made her parents ecstatic and, Bella, nervous. How could she screw up now? Which is exactly what she had done. How could she have been so stupid? She and Rod had only being having sex for a few months, ever since her "Introduction to Society" ball on her 16th birthday last April;and here it was December.

Bella groaned, pulling herself from her thoughts and smoothing her shirt down. "You know, Bellatrix, this paranoia really must go away." She spoke to herself, kicking off her Mary Jane's, and throwing on a pair of slip on shoes. "You can do this. Just remember_ nothing _is wrong." She grabbed her school robe off her bed, throwing it over her right arm, and picked up the box, shoving it inside the robe. "It's now or _never_."

Bella scurried past the Great Hall doors, to the first stair case and in the direction of the girls' facilities on the second floor. She would not risk using a lavatory on any other floor for fear of being caught. No one ever used the bathroom on the second floor, not only was it haunted by the most annoying ghost in history, but a girl had died in it. Bellatrix, however, would not be easily deterred by something as silly as a dumb ghost, or the machinations of student elaborated stories. She would have about twenty minutes until dinner was out; just enough to take the test, but she'd still have to come back to check for the results, or maybe she could take it with her? But, honestly, did she really want to carry something covered in urine? No.

She bounded through the bathroom doors, feeling a bit light headed; a feeling she had, had a lot lately along with nausea--all the symptoms her Aunt Walburga had when pregnant with Regulus, but she still refused to believe in a possible pregnancy.

Her wand was raised as she walked into the bathroom, there was no such thing as being too safe; elaborated stories and ghosts did not scare her, but she would not take a chance on a random idiot being inside. Bella was determined to keep this incident as a secret. The less people who knew the better. Looking around, she saw nothing but empty and wide open space; exactly what she wanted.

Hastily, Bella bounded over to a stall, slamming the door behind her. "Lumos," She called out as the tip of her wand lit and she pulled the box from her robes and threw the robe over the door. Setting her wand down on the floor, she fiddled with the card board packaging tempted to just blast it open, but fearful of destroying the test; after all, it was made by muggles. As if the plastic stick was poison, she pulled it from its' packaging and wrinkled her nose.

"OH, Merlin. I really have to pee on this…disgusting and positively barbaric. Stupid muggles…I really do hate them." She mumbled as she contemplated how exactly she would do this. She did have to use the restroom, but how would she actually pee on the test was a different conundrum.

"Muggles…absolutely hate them, with a passion…pee on a test…ugh." She groaned finally deciding on to just go for it. She pulled the plastic off the stick and lifted her skirt, pulling down her underwear; feeling absolutely silly and awkward.

Fifteen minutes later Bella sat on the floor of the bathroom lobby, legs folded, pregnancy test in front of her sitting atop the box , which she had levitated out, refusing to touch it. Her wand sat right beside her and her hands were shaking profusely. She could not hide her nerves. Her skin was hot, her stomach upset, and an oncoming headache beat against her skull.

"Please, I can't be…I just can't." She refused to say the word once again. "I'm not pr…," A chill cool dashed through the air pulling Bella from her thoughts. It was time for detention_. _

_Detention and a pregnancy test all in one day, Great Bella, real great._ She thought, standing, and pausing. What could she do with the stupid test? The test still had another hour and forty five minutes until it was complete. No one ever came to this bathroom, but could she really count people to do the same again? _If I'm late, I'll have to stay extra…I'll just come back. _She decided looking around for a place to stash the test. Her eyes settled on a waste basket in the corner.

"Maybe," She thought. "I could just hid it under the stupid waste basket, or—"she paused staring at the stalls. "Who is really going to come in here, I'll just hide it behind one of these." She stalked over to the stall farthest from the door, which sat in the corner; levitating the test behind her and directing it into the stall. Magically, it settled on the back of the porcelain bowl. Bella stepped back and slammed the stall door closed, mumbling an incantation, waving her wand and sealing it up; ensuring that no one would, or could, open it.

Turning around, she pointed her wand at the disgustingly pink box and whispered, "Confringo." Setting the box ablaze and watching as it burned. Once no pink remnants remained a spout of water sprang from her wand.

"Plus means pregnant, line means not pregnant." She whispered, committing to memory the possible results and meanings. In about an hour in a half, everything was either going to stay the same or change completely. Was Bella ready for it? Inside, she felt like screaming; outside, she felt like hitting something. She had taken the test, but what would it say?


	6. Waiting

**A/N: I am having a bit of a battle with myself in regards to this chapter. I hope that Bella does not come off OOC. I don't think she does. I think that she come off as just vulnerable, which if we remember the situation, is a feasible way to act. Please, enjoy. The irony of the title i'm sure will earn me virtual kicks. Thank you for reading.**

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**Waiting**

An hour into detention, cleaning potion viles, and Bellatrix was on the verge of losing it, already breaking three viles by "accident." Her nerves where on end and every inch of her body was sweating. The only thing she could concentrate on, or think about was the pregnancy test sitting in a bathroom stall on the second floor.

_If, IF, I'm pre…no, I won't even think about it. It's not even a possibility. We only forgot protection one time, once! It's taken Rod longer than that to actually become good at sex, and for me to enjoy it. _Her mind was racing a mile per minute as she lost her grip on a test tube and sending it crashing to the stone floor.

"Ms. Black!" Professor Slughorn's voice interceded into her thoughts, making Bella jump, her heart race. Was it time?

"Professor, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. My head doesn't seem to be…in place. I'm just as clumsy as a dimwitted house elf." She groaned, bending down to pick up the shards, but before she had the chance to, they had reassembled themselves and were on a path to a counter. Bella sighed, standing.

"I've never seen you, my hot headed potions genius, this disarrayed. What's bothering you?" He asked, turning to Bella; a concerned look on his face.

"I'm just nervous that's all." Her mouth spoke before her brain had a chance to catch up. Now he'd ask why she was nervous, _I think I'm pregnant_ wasn't really an answer she could give him either.

"Ah, say no more. I understand."

Bella's head snapped up in confusion. He understood, but what did he understand? Could he tell she was pregnant, did it show? Bella backed away awaiting the worse, her eyes gazing in the direction of her stomach.

"It's your N.E.W.T.S, isn't it? You're worried you won't do well, aren't you?" He smiled in her direction and her worried dissipated.

_Silly old man_, Bella thought, _If you only knew how that is the least of my worries at the moment._ "Yes, that's it." She quickly piped up; a smiled plastered to her face, relief washing over her.

"Is that why you took your frustration out on Ms. Skeeter?" He peered down at her, raising an excusatory brow and then letting a smile cross his lips. Professor Slughorn was always fond of Bellatrix, which Bella knew and always played to her advantage.

She bit her bottom lip and tilted her head to the side, as if she was stuck in deep thought. "It's not like I _hurt_ her," She scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk. Bella." Professor Slughorn spoke shaking his head. "My dear, haven't I told you about that temper before? You are one of my most prized students, but that nasty disposition of yours at times can be," He paused, searching for the right word. "Difficult."

"Me, difficult? Why, never." She feigned ignorance, allowing her mind to have a worry free moment. "I have to be strong, Professor. If I'm not who will be? Both of my sisters allow people to walk over them. Cissy, she's, well between the two of us, she's a bit of a crier, and Andy I'm worried about her. She doesn't keep the right company. So I have to be hard and," she paused, rolling her eyes. "_Difficult_; you know, be the bigger sister. It's always been my job to set the right example. I'll admit I didn't set _exactly_ the right example earlier, but they'll learn to defend themselves."

"Bella, you don't always have to be so brash. You're a chi—a young lady now, a brilliant one at that."

_One that knows how to screw up, royally. _She sighed.

"Here, I have something for you. I meant to give it to you later, and hopefully not in this type of situation. I swear I may see you more than your own parents do, advanced potions class, and detention, almost every day." He laughed, holding up a hand to and beckoning for her to wait one moment, as he turned and walked off in the direction of his office. Like she'd be going anywhere, this was detention after all.

Alone at the lab desk, Bella's worries began to make their way back. For a moment, her mind had been clear of all thoughts regarding her potential pregnancy, but now, alone, all she could do was think of it. What would she do if she was pregnant? Who would she tell, who could she tell? Narcissa wasn't an option, she'd tell Cygnus and Druella; Andromeda would do the same. Although Aunt Walburga had given her the incantations for the anti conception charms, and sex advice, Bella was more than sure her aunt would run straight to her mother. Her mother…could she tell her? What would she say?

Bellatrix and Druella didn't have the best of a relationship, but her mother was usually there for her, could Bella count on her for this? What about Cygnus, her father? Bella and her father weren't the closes. Cygnus had always wanted a boy, Bella was more than willing to be his boy; frills and bows were never her thing, but Cygnus always ignored her attempts; dismissing her as a foolish girl. He often viewed his daughters as property more than human beings. Narcissa was the exception. He prided himself on making sure that his daughters would enter proper pureblood marriages, as just that, pure. Being sixteen, unmarried, and pregnant meant that she was no doubt tainted in her father's eyes. Would her parents force her to marry Rodolphus? She did love Rod; she did, but not enough to marry him. Bella never felt the urge to marry. And, where did Rod stand in all of this he was the baby's father. Contrary to what the school seemed to think of her, Bella, did not sleep around.

"Ahh, here it is!" Professor Slughorn interjected, unaware of the contemplative look present on Bellatrix's face, setting a large, very old looking book, down in front of her. "This," He tapped a hand on the cover, "was mine when I took my N.E.W.T.S. I've added to it over the years, obviously, but it's yours' my dear to study from. Every potion, concoction, and recipe I've ever come across is here."

"Huh? Oh," She smiled as she stirred from her thoughts, unaware of tears that had formed in the corners of her eyes. "Professor Slughorn, you're giving this to me?"

"Yes, I am. I see great potential in you. You are going to go on to become a great witch. Now, if I can say I helped you along the way, then that would be my honor. It's yours."

"You know, my father thinks I'm just a silly little girl. I'm only taking my N.E.W.T.S because it will look good on our family." Bella found herself confessing without much thought. It was easy for her to speak to Slughorn.

"Oh, poppy cock now my dear. You're absolutely amazing. You'll do well, believe me." He grinned sliding the book in her direction and then looking at the clock on the wall. "Technically, Minerva asked that I keep you for three hours, but you seem tired." He noted, pointing to the tears in her eyes. "It's been about two now, so go on. Go get some rest."

"I have a feeling I won't be getting any rest tonight." Bella murmured referring to what she was on her way to do next.

"Ah, sleepy witch, rest does a body, and brain good."

Bella couldn't help but smile. "Goodnight professor. Thank you." She scooped the large book up in her small arms and turned on her heels, almost feeling better about herself until she found herself standing in front of the second floor staircase.

**(Well, I'm pretty sure all of you are virtually kicking me. Sorry. I promise, cross my heart-hope to-die-stick-a-needle-in-my-eye that the next chapter will be dedicated solely to results. Love.)**


	7. Unexpected Results

**A/N: This story is dedicated to my Best Friend Hanna, aka Mesteria, which this is now her gift fic, Love you! Thank you to all my readers, and reviewers. Without you guys I would quit, so thanks! Anywho, enjoy. Not as long as I wanted, but I have to go where my creativity takes me. The Italic passage is a flash back, just in case you can't tell. This was my first experiment with flashback.I will be updating my other story soon. Promise. A special thanks also goes to the keeper of my sanity, , aka Jacalyn Hyde. Love you!((Lia, I'm dying to know your thoughts)).**

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**Unexpected Results**

Immediately, Bella began to feel light headed and nervous beyond belief.

The book in her arms now felt heavier than a sack of bricks as she climbed the stairs, one at a time.

Why was she taking so long to climb the stairs? This is what she had been waiting for, for the last three days: confirmation that she was not pregnant. Well, here it was. Yet, a part of her couldn't help but feel a hole being ripped through her chest with each step she took.

Going as slow as she could, suddenly she found herself in front of the door to the bathroom. She placed a hand on the door knob and gripped it tightly, her knuckles turning white from her grip, yet she still did not push it open. Both of her arms were on the verge of going numb, one from extraneous weight of the book, the other from her death grip on the door handle.

"You can do this damn it, you're not pre…you're not in that way! Just open the door." She hissed under her breathe trying to persuade herself. The more she talked it over in her head, the less her feet moved.

After some time, and a lot of mental kicks, she was inside of the bathroom. Two hours now seemed like five minutes as she paced towards the stall, passing a nearby sink and setting the book on it. Her mind was blank and her whole body was on the path of convulsions as she pulled her wand to undo her spells. "Lum…lumos." She called illuminating the tip of her wand and walking towards the porcelain bowl. Her heart beat was racing and she felt hot, very hot, to the point that she was sure she'd faint at any moment.

Like a scarlet letter, the muggle pregnancy sat on the back of the toilet, calling out to her. She had made sure to turn it over so that the results did not face her when she returned.

"Levi—levious—"She stuttered, as she raised her arm to the air. The test rocked back and forth but did not move. Her throat was dry and the words would not come out right. "Leviousa" Bella called once again, her throat unknotting, as the test flew into the air and she directed it out of the stall.

_Plus means pregnant, line means not pregnant, plus, line, plus, line._ She repeated as she walked towards the piece of plastic dangling in air, the results still facing away from her.

Slowly, she levitated the plastic stick around so that the front of it faced her. Bella let out a silent gasp, both wand and test flying to the floor, her eyes immediately filling with tears. There _it_ was starring at her, two lines one crossed over the other, a plus sign.

"NO." She mouthed slipping to her knees. "No…" She shook her head in disbelief, refusing to believe the plus sign, which starred at her from the floor, mocking her. Sadness rose inside of her as she felt her heart hit the pit of her stomach, followed by anger.

"NO! It's a lie! It's this stupid muggle contraption. I was so stupid for even purchasing it. Anything made by muggles is not worth half of a galleon…" she trailed of, pausing as she felt hot tears run against her cheeks. "Damn Muggles!" She screamed again reaching for her wand and pulling her knees out from under her. "Confringo!" She shouted, blasting the test into flames. The smell of burning plastic filled the air.

Denial swarmed through her thoughts. "I'm not pregnant!" She griped wiping warm tears from her eyes. The signs had been there for the last three weeks; two missed periods, nausea, her chest being sore, plus mood swings, all of them were here.

"Oh, God, no." She cried as the fire burned out and she eased herself down against the cold stone floor, her mind floating back to what would eventually come to be known as "the date of conception."

_***It was Halloween Day and the castle was ablaze with holiday cheer. Inside the Slytherin dungeons loud rock music blasted. Bellatrix sat in a nearby corner, legs curled underneath her, and a bottle of wine in hand. Sometimes she enjoyed Halloween, at other times she found it to be just an excuse for people to act like idiots. That night, most people seemed to be on the idiot track._

_"Trix, why did you leave me?" Rodolphus called out standing above her. Bella brought the wine bottle to her lips and tilted her head back, ignoring him. "Trixie, what did I do?" He sat down next to her, placing his hand on her knee, but she shook it off. "Don't be like that…."_

_"Oh, so now you notice I'm here." She scoffed, scooting away from him, but he moved closer._

_"What do you mean?" He asked, confused._

_"You haven't paid any attention to me all night; and I saw you talking to Alexandria Nott."_

_"Nott, her? No, I don't…Bella, don't be like this. I've just been busy."_

_"Yeah, with McNair, Dolohov, and Rookwood; the three who share a brain! The only reason I came to this stupid thing was for you." Bella pouted. "We haven't spent any time together in forever. I feel like we're strangers. You only make time for me when you want to sleep with me." She sat the bottle down and folded her arms across her chest._

_Rod looked at her, shaking his head. "I'm not going to validate that with a response because you know it's not true. You have that stupid advanced potions class and I am quidditch captain this year. Neither of us have time. I love you, Bella, not just your body. Believe me, if that was all I wanted I would've broken up with you by now."_

_"I thought you weren't going to dignify that with a response?" She stated matter-of-factly, nudging him for his last comment. "Go find your friends and leave me be."_

_"No, you're here and this is where I want to be. Plain and simple."_

_She smiled at his last remark. "Then, if you want to be with me—and just me, let's get out of here." Bella turned her head raising a brow. "Let's go for a walk and talk."_

_"Deal, Trixie." He stood and held out a hand for her to grab. Eagerly, she took it, jumping to her feet; bottle of wine still in hand as they weaved through a large crowd of people and out the exit. When they reached the hall, Bella slipped off her hells, setting them outside the dungeon entrance._

_"No need to alert Filch. I'm sure his night is pretty busy as is. We don't need to be his next case." She laughed pulling on Rod's hand, leading him up a set of stairs and to the first floor corridor. The stone floors were cold against her feet as she pulled away from him and ran up the steps two at a time, but instead of stopping at the first floor, she ran to a second set of stairs._

_"You know, Trix," He shook his head; "if you don't want to be caught by Filch then we shouldn't be running around the castle like mad people."_

_"Just come on." Bella rolled her eyes, beckoning for him to hurry. He broke into a sprint, meeting her on the steps. She laced a hand into one of his leading him to another flight of stairs; these ones leading to the Astronomy Tower. They walked the steps, hand and hand, silently. Bellatrix could feel butterflies in her stomach as she felt his hand snuggled in hers. "Would you like a drink?" She raised the wand bottle, offering it to him._

_Rod took the bottle from her and placed his lips over where hers had been earlier, taking a large swig. "Red, I thought that you didn't like red wine?"_

_"But you like it, and I told you, I've missed you."_

_He shook his head grinning as they came to the entrance for the Astronomy Tower. "I've missed you too. Do you have to take that class?" He asked referring to her advanced potions course._

_"Yes, I do. I'm taking my NEWTS, daddy is making me. I don't want to fail my NEWTS and disgrace the family." She leaned her head against his shoulder, feeling the cold chill her bones as they found themselves starring at the night sky._

_Rod watched as she began to shiver, he pulled off his casual robes, and wrapped them around her shoulders. "You're star is out, Trixie." He pointed to a cluster of glowing dots shining brightly as he wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his chin on her shoulder. Bella brought the bottle of wine to her lips and smiled placing a hand over his._

_"Finally Halloween is going the way I pictured." She grinned, turning in his arms to face him. "Kiss me?"_

_Without hesitation he brought his lips to hers, parting them and sliding his tongue into her mouth. Her arms wrapped his neck pulling him closer, dropping the wine bottle, and his hands roamed the sides of her body, finding their way under his robe and her shirt, resting at the small of her back. His hands were cold against her warm skin._

_Bella could feel her knees going weak under her, moaning as she felt his caress. Feebly, her hands shaking, she unwound her arms from his neck and untucked his tie from his vest._

_"Make love to me, Lestrange, now." She moaned between kisses, her hands reaching for his belt._

_"So now all you want me for is sex?" A smirk crossed his lips._

_"Of course that's all I want." She rolled her eyes in rebuttal._

_"You're sure, Bella?" He groaned, struggling to keep his composure as he pulled his hungry lips from hers; parts of his anatomy were becoming very stiff. "You know I will, but I need for you to—"_

_"Are you going to talk or are you going to take me?" She whispered breathlessly, her heart beating a mile per minute. He obliged lifting her in his arms_

_Afterwards, they lay on the floor of the tower, wrapped in Rod's robes. Bella was snuggled close to Rod, a look of utter complacency on her face._

_"Is everyone happy? He joked, kissing the top of her head. She laughed and nodded._

_Both smiled wide as neither remembered that they had forgotten the most important of things—protection. ***_

Bella remembered now, as she lay upon the cold floor, tears pouring from her eyes. She felt like she was going to be sick. Never, in her entire life, had she felt so disgustingly low and alone.

"I can't be…no…please. I didn't mean to. It was only once. We only forgot once…"She trailed off and brought her knees up to her stomach, sobbing violently. "What am I going to do?" Her voice pleaded to no one.

Soon her violent sobs turned into silent cries and then blank stares. She was lost inside as she hugged her knees, closing her eyes tightly, and rocking back and forth. "What have I done?"


	8. Distracted

**A/N: Well, hello, here it is: Chapter 8. I don't know how frequently I'll be updating. I've become very disenchanted with a lot of things, as of late. I don't like it having an impact on my writing, but it has. Anyways, I have to thank the WONDERFUL Lia, for beta-ing this for me. She's truly awesome and one of the best people I know. She's also the one to thank for my sanity being some what together enough to write. Love you! **

** Hannie, you better enjoy. Love you! **

**Everyone else, thanks for reading and I look forward to your thoughts. **

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**Distracted **

Curled in the fetal position, Bella lay strewn across the floor of the bathroom. Every inch of her was on fire and she couldn't stop shaking. All she could think about was how she had ruined everything. What she had ruined exactly, she did not know. Her body: yes; her reputation: yes; but, most importantly, her family's reputation. How could she set a good example for her sisters, who were counting on her, or create pride her parents? She should have been studying for her NEWTS, instead she's was here, cold and alone.

"Why are you crying?" A nasal-heavy voice called out to Bella.

At first, Bella ignored the voice, keeping her eyes shut tight. Maybe she was hearing things; maybe it'd go away… _everything_ would go away.

"Why did you burn that box?" The voice called again.

Bella's eyes flew up and she immediately sat up. "Excuse me? I didn't burn anything." She searched for the owner of the vocals, looking around but not seeing anyone.

"Yes you did. I saw you." The voice spoke, this time inches from Bella's ear. Bella turned seeing none other than Moaning Myrtle, the ghost who haunted the bathroom, floating two feet from her.

"Get away from me. You're just a stupid ghost who thinks it saw something!" Bella snapped, wiping at her eyes.

"I'm not an IT! I'm a girl!" Myrtle shouted back, her voice cracking almost as if she was crying.

"I don't give a damn what you are! You are a filthy mudblood who got what she deserved!" Bella was hysterical, her throat dry, and her eyes swollen.

Myrtle's mouth fell open and she burst into tears. "You're mean and hurtful!"

"AND YOU'RE DEAD!" Bella shouted back, her face bright read and flushed.

With a grand exit, Myrtle flew off and down a toilet, sending a puddle of water into the air.

"Bella?" Another voice called out to Bellatrix as she rolled her eyes and turned her head from the scene that had just unfolded.

"Andy, what are you doing in here?"

"I can ask you the same thing!" Andromeda retorted, taking notice of Bella's appearance.

Bella did the same with Andromeda, eyeing her suspiciously and seeing a large red circle on her neck.

"None of your business, but if you must know, I was walking back to the dorms. Were you crying, Bells?"

"You're lying." Bella remarked, ignoring her sister's question and slowly getting to her feet.

"About what?" Andromeda feigned ignorance.

"You were snogging someone, I can see the hickey." She snapped back, walking over to the mirrors and glancing up into one. Her mind was still numb with denial and confusion. Her hands were shaking and she was almost a hundred percent sure that she was going to fall apart, both mentally and physically. Feebly, she forced herself to keep it together.

"You were crying." Andromeda changed the subject. "You never cry. Is there something wrong?"

_Yes_. "No." She lied, ignoring her sister's assertions. "I…had something in my eyes."

"Now who's lying?"Andy countered sensing something was up with her sister. "What's wrong?"

Bella turned the faucet on, filling her hands with water and then splashing it against her face. "Nothing!" She growled, slamming her hands against the sink to signal the end of the discussion. "Now, please, can we change the subject?"

"Fine, why were you in here?" Andy questioned, not giving up that easily: changing the subject, but not the point.

"I'm going to bed, are you coming?" Bella ignored her attempts, walking over to the round side of the sink and picking of her book. She could feel tears pooling in the back of her throat as she pressed the book against her stomach_. I'm pregnant_. She repeated the words in her head, zoning out as she walked towards the doors, Andy behind her. A zombie-like look resided on her countenance as they eased down the stairs and to the dungeons. Her mind was in a haze.

"Pregnant…" She whispered aloud; unaware of both that fact that she was speaking audibly and that Andromeda was standing next to her.

"What, Bella?"Andromeda paused, looking at her. "Did you say something?"

"Huh? No, I didn't. Now, come on." She stepped up to the portrait and gave the password; the portrait swung open allowing them access.

"Bella, there _is_ something wrong? What is it?"

"I said nothing."

_Everything. I've screwed up, badly_. She thought to herself, pulling the book closer to her stomach, uncomfortable in her own skin. "I just want to go to bed and pretend that this day didn't happen."

"Okay, you're scaring me now. Did something happen at detention?"

"WILL YOU STOP TRYING TO ANALYZE ME? I'M FINE!" Bella shouted quickly becoming annoyed at Andromeda's attempts to help.

"FINE! Don't tell me, but I will not tolerate you being a bitch! Get over yourself. I was just trying to help." Andy retorted, stomping away angrily and walking into the common room.

Bella took in a deep breath, biting down on her bottom lip until she could taste blood and then walked ahead to the common room.

Her heart sank to the pit of her stomach as she walked further into the common room, stopping shy of the sofa. There was Rodolphus, sitting by the fire, quidditch notes in hand. He seemed to be focusing hard. What was she going to say? What was she going to do? He seemed so content sitting by the fire, consumed with his work; she didn't want to ruin that with her "bundle" of news. He had a right to know though... Didn't he?

She took a step in his direction, not quite sure what she was doing yet, when Rita Skeeter walked over to Rod, sitting down next to him. Bella could feel the heat in her face rise. She watched as Rita began to giggle, leaning into Rod, and then running her hand down his shoulder. Bella moved closer, her ears stretching to hear what Rita was laughing so cavalier about; every inch of her on fire. Rod didn't seem to be pushing her away or denying her affections, which made Bellatrix even angrier. Bella watched as Rita's hands ran down Rod's arms, stopping at his bicep and giving it a squeeze. Bella took a deep breath, seeing red as she stormed over to where they sat. She shifted the potions manual in her arms, and cleared her throat.

"Take your hands off of my boyfriend or you will lose them." She threatened, lowering her eyes so that she was looking directly at Rita, who had yet to move; a dumb smirk on her face.

"Trixie, it isn't what you think. She was just asking—"

"NOW!" Bella demanded, two seconds from putting her book down and removing Rita's hand herself.

"I was just talking to him. Is he not allowed to talk to other people, Mummy?" Rita raised an eyebrow and reluctantly let his bicep go.

"People, yes; trashy whores, no."

"I don't see your mudblood-loving sister around here anywhere." Rita smirked, standing so that she was inches from Bella.

"I thought you learned your lesson earlier, Skeeter…" Bellatrix threatened, her jaw locking as she dropped the book from her arms, causing it to hit the ground with a loud crash, and pulling her wand.

"Rita, I think it's time you left." Rod's voice interceded, stepping in between them and wrapping a hand over Bella's wand.

"Yes, I suppose, Roddy. I must get my beauty sleep, which would do you so good too, Bella. You look like hell." She blew an air kiss at Rod and flounced away, shouting "Good Luck at your match tomorrow, Roddy, with those muscles, you'll do well."

Bella struggled to undo his hand from over the top of her wand. She was more than ready to send a hex Rita's way.

"Why are you defending her?" Bella demanded, once Rita was out of sight and Rod had let her hand go, She put her wand away. "Why were you even talking to her?"

"Trix, I wasn't. I was going over my quidditch notes for tomorrow's game when--"

"Oh, just shut up! I stood right there and watched her touch all over you! You did nothing to push her away!" Bella began to grow hysterical, tears forming her eyes as the realization of her situation sank into her mind. She was pregnant...and here was her boyfriend—_no, her baby's father now_—letting a woman throw herself at him without second thought…

Perplexed, Rod watched as she turned red, tears streaming from her eyes. A few people had been in the common room and watched the scene unfold, including Andromeda, who had ignored Rita's jabs and was making her way to Bellatrix.

"Bella, love," Rod called out to her, delicately placing his hand to her cheek, and tilting her chin upwards. "What's wrong?" He asked, unsure of how she was going to react as he stared into her large black eyes.

"I'm…I'm, I'm pr… just let go of me!" She shouted pulling her face from his grasp, refusing to finish her words. "Go ask _Rita_ what's wrong with her! Leave _me_ alone!" She turned to leave, forgetting about her potions book, but Rod grabbed her wrist before she had the chance to make it up the stairs.

"Don't, Bellatrix! Don't take this attitude with me!"

"Let me go!"

"Not until you tell me what's wrong, and don't say 'Rita'; I know it's something else!"

She couldn't stop the tears as she felt them flow hotly and freely down her face. In her heart, she wanted to tell him, but in her mind something was stopping her. "I've ruined everything! Merlin, I'm so stupid! I can't take it back; I can't! It's all a mess... I shouldn't have done it. Why did I let you?" She mumbled hysterically.

"Let me _what_? Bella, just stop! Just stop, and tell me what's going on."

"Let me go!"

"No! What's—"

A loud slap rang through the air as Bella brought her hand to his face. "Leave me alone!" She cried, running up the stairs as he let go of her arm in shock. The whole room was watching in silence. Andromeda ran up the stairs after Bella, potion book in hand.


	9. One Big Mess

**A/N: Sorry for the delay guys. As I said in recently, I ran into some unforeseen circumstances. Nothing I could do about it. I'm going to try and get up as many chapters as i can before I start school again, which is soon. I must apologize for this chapter as well. Grammar has never been my strong suit and my email is a crack pot, that pretty much sums it all up. I should have another chapter up soon, very soon, promise. Enjoy. **

**Love.**

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One big mess

The next day came and went with relatively little change. Bella's disposition was still one of utter denial and confusion. She refused to believe that she was pregnant, but could not deny the fact that all the signs were there. Her denial was a complete and utter waste of time; she knew this, but felt the need to hang on to something that seemed plausible, even denial.

Her fight with Rodolphus was the talk of the tower; everyone, especially Rita Skeeter, had something to say about it: _"Rod is cheating on, Bellatrix, with Rita," "Bella caught Rod sneaking around,"_ "_Rod and Bella are breaking up."_ Surely her absence from his quidditch match that afternoon would not go unnoticed, serving to add fuel to the flames.

All of the rumors seemed to be irrelevant except for the last one, which Bella didn't even know the truth too: Had she and Rod split? Last night had been by no means the first time they had fought; usually it was the same scenario: Rod had done something, unknowingly, to piss Bella off. Eventually she would explain and forgive his mistake, but this time, Bella could not-and would not-explain to him what he had done wrong. She wasn't even sure if he had done something wrong. After all, she had been the one eager to engage in the tempted dance of lovers—not Rod, but he had not pushed her away.

So, here she sat now: curled in front the fire; the lonely December air circling below the warmth of the flames. The potion's book Professor Slughorn had given her sat open on her lap; yesterday's uniform still clung, wrinkled, and worn to her body; she hadn't the energy, nor will to change last night, crying herself to sleep. Bellatrix never cried. Andromeda had followed, Bella, up the stairs, trying eagerly to help, but resulting in not only failure, but a shouting match.

Oblivious to the activity around her, mindlessly, Bella turned a page of her book. She sighed, eyes skimming across the needed ingredients for making the potion to induce Euphoria, the constant state of happiness. She read and reread the ingredients, wondering exactly what it would be like to be happy, which she hadn't been in a while (and feared never being again). How could she even think of being cheerful and happy in a situation like her own? Her predicament would destroy everyone, including herself.

_"Why am I even reading this?"_ Bella thought, her fingers roaming over the page, and pausing at what appeared to be Professor Slughorn's handwriting: _Euphoria is not for the faint of heart. Being forever happy is not as joyous as one would think. You can lose yourself. Also, peppermint reduces the singing side effect. _She grinned remembering earlier that year when she had brewed the potion using no peppermint. Alexandria Nott sang for hours—badly, very badly. After a while, Bella was eager for her to shut up.

_"I won't even be able to take my exams; not like this."_ She sighed, tracing the scribbles of Slughorn's writing. _"I've ruined so many things, haven't I? When Daddy finds out…daddy…now he'll really wish for sons…" _Her thoughts trailed off as a shadow fell across her book, illuminated by the flames of the fire.

Bella looked up to see Rodolphus standing in front of her, his right arm snuggled close to his chest with a what appeared to be bandages: a sling.

"Where were you?"He asked, almost as if he needed to catch his breath. He seemed to be panting and his face was red.

Instead of acknowledging his presences with an answer she shrugged her shoulders and glanced back down at her book, turning the page.

"So, I take it you're still mad at me then?" He questioned sitting down beside her on the pitch black sofa, cradling his arm. His voice was low as he turned to stare at her, her eyes still fixed upon the book in front of her.

Still no answer.

"Bloody hell, Bella, if you will not tell me what I did to make you mad—hell, if you won't even talk to me—how will I know how to fix it?"

She glanced up, her eyes meeting his: blank. So many thoughts were running through her mind, yet she couldn't form a coherent one. Her mind seemed to be babbling; half of her wanted to tell him everything, half of her wanted to punch him just for asking "_What's wrong_." She was confused, quiet, and, as far as she was concerned, alone. What would telling Rodolphus do? Would he be upset, angry? Should she be angry? He had done this to her. He had put her in this situation—hadn't he?

"What would you like me to say, Rod?"Her voice was distant, and her eyes immediately fell back against the paper. She fingered the pages, eyeing the notations from Slughorn a little more intently, but not paying much attention to them.

His mouth fell open, and then closed, confused.

"Well…," his voice was filled with caution, almost as if she'd explode as any moment. "You can start by telling me what they hell yesterday was about."

"Yesterday?"

"Yes, yesterday. You bloody well bit my head off—twice!" He stated, his bottom lip jutting out as he moved his bandaged arm around a bit.

She shrugged her shoulders once more, giving him no definite answer, turning the page, when Rod's hand stopped her. He shut the book and pulled it away from her.

"Something is bothering you, something bad, very bad. I don't know if I did it or not. But, as far as the rumors go, if that is what you're worried about, I'm not-nor have I ever-slept with Rita. " He paused, effortlessly holding the oversized book in the hand that belonged to his good arm. "I was just sitting here yesterday when she sat down next to me—"

"Give me back my book." She snapped, angry, reaching for it, but Rod pulled it back. "Give it back to me, now."

"Trixie_, what's wrong_?"

"I will give you two more seconds to give me my book back,"

"No, not until you tell me what's wrong." He let out an exhausted sigh, still juggling the book with his free hand.

"Fine, have it your way…" She pulled her wand, aiming it at his arm hanging loosely in its sling.

"DON'T!" He shouted, dropping the book into his lap and wrapping his good hand around her wand. "I'm just trying to help."

She lowered her eyes, meeting his, locking his gaze.

After a few seconds, which had seemed like hours, he reluctantly let go of her wand, and then handed her back the oversized potions manual.

Bella put her wand away, took the book in both of her hands and leaned against the back of the sofa, numb. He just wanted to help. Hadn't he helped enough?

She rolled her eyes and then scoffed. "_Help_. " She repeated with sarcasm. Her expression changed, however, when she noticed his was of worry and tenderness.

Sighing, "What happened?" She asked with sincerity.

At first, his expression contorted with hesitation and uncertainty; he seemed to be searching for a way to answer her question. "I shattered my elbow…"He paused, turning to stare at her. "I was distracted…."

"By what?"

"By you."

"By me?" Her face scrunched up and her brows furrowed together. "I wasn't even there!"

"Exactly, my point."

"Point? You don't have a point."

"Yes, I do. _You_ not being there caused me to miss the fact that a bludger was flying at me! I glanced around to look for you and BAM!" He made a huge gesture with his free hand to signal a bludger coming at him. "I wake up in the hospital wing with Madame Pomfrey telling me I've shattered my elbow. They can't do anything for a few days; the bone growth potion has to take complete affect before they set it."

Bella fidgeted in her seat, the weight of the book making her legs go a bit numb. She breathed in quickly, and then shook her head, a disgusted smirk playing on her features. "So, according to you, I am the one to blame for your arm; correction, your own stupidity?"

"My arm yes, but as far as my stupidity goes, I guess I shouldn't worry about you then!" His voice began to grow louder, less controlled as he stood on his feet.

"No!" She shouted back, the volume of her voice overtaking taking his. "You've done more than enough!"

"What in the hell are you talking about, Bella?"

"I'm talking about…" She paused wondering where the truth would fit at that moment and decided that it didn't. "I'm talking about you, and what happened…how I let it happen. I, I'm…"She was growing flustered and hot, she wasn't feeling too well, and her head began to throb. "Get out of my way!" She shouted, standing in a hurry, her arms aching under the weight of the book.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"To my room, now get away from me!"

"Why is it every time I feel like you're getting ready to tell me what is bothering you, you suddenly decide to shut me out?" He reached out with his healthy hand to grab her wrist.

"Let go of me, now, Rodolphus." Her voice was cold and sharp.

"No."

"Get out of my way before this arm," She looked down at his limb, which was still attached to hers. "Looks like the other; and I promise you, Madame Pomfrey won't be able to fix it."

Reluctantly, he let her go, and took a step back, away from her. "Trixie, if you don't want to be with me anymore, then tell me. You don't have to rip me apart every time I'm with you."

"Did I ever once say I didn't want you to be with you anymore?" Her voice was flat as she choked back oncoming tears fighting to fall down her face.

"Well, then tell me what's wrong."

Bella was silent for what had seemed like hours. Her eyes would not and could not meet his. How could she possibly tell him what was wrong? This was her body, so it was her problem then, right? She felt as if she was standing in front of Rod naked, as if exposed to the whole house, as if everyone knew what she had done, that she was pregnant. To make matters worse, she really did feel awful, sick as could be, nauseous. Rod stared back at her, intensity in his eyes as he waited for her to speak.

"I don't feel well. Let me go."

"See!" He sneered stepping away from her. "Don't tell me. Fine. I couldn't care less." Finally giving in, Rod scoffed, turned and walked away.

A piece of Bella broke as he did. She wanted to run after him, tell him everything, but this was her problem, her mistake; she would fix it. No one needed to know. Did they? No, they didn't. She'd fix everything, not just for herself, for her family, her sisters, for Rod.


	10. Conversations with other Witches

**A/N: Hello everyone. Well, you're back so it must mean you like this. Yay -cheers- Wow, am I feeling random or what? More like delusional. I'm very tired right now. But, I know you don't care, and that would love for me to stop talking so you can read, right? Thought so. Most of you will probably skip this and go straight to the reading anyways. Must say tho, updates will start getting very few and far between. I go back to school in September. Sorry, but for some unkempt reason, that comes first. I have another update coming tomorrow for this tho. **

**Thanks again goes to Lia, keeper of Connie, stopper of stabbing, and (can't forget this one) my beta. (Me to the machine: "Would you like to play a game") **

**Hannie, you better still be enjoying this! I'll take my Bellab anytime soon too...HAHA...;) **

**ENJOY. Love. **

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**Conversations with Other Witches. **

Refusing to let one tear trickle from her eyes, Bella took a deep breath, pursed her lips, and stomped off, almost losing her balance, but dropping her potion's manual instead. Instead of picking it up, she kicked it as hard as she could, sending it sailing in the direction of the stairs.

"Bellatrix, are you alright?" Bella looked up to see Andromeda, her second youngest sister, stop the book with her foot and then bend down to pick it up.

"I'm fine." She lied, still feeling a bit light headed. "It just slipped from my grasp."

"I watched you almost lose your balance." Andy added cutting through the lie. "You aren't feeling well again, are you?"

"Again? I don't recall a time when I haven't felt well."

"You threw up yesterday."

"Must you be so vile in public?"

"This coming from you?" Andromeda raised a brow and extended her arm out to hand Bella the book.

"Shut up." Bella groaned.

"Now who's being vulgar?"

"Telling you to mind your business isn't being vulgar."

"Neither is the truth." Andy countered, folding her arms. "Have you packed yet?"

"Packed?"

In the midst of everything occurring at once the last couple of days, Bellatrix had forgotten about the upcoming holiday: Christmas, which meant three weeks at home…

"No, I haven't. It slipped my mind in between detention, reading, and…" She trailed off, sighing as she did so. Three weeks at home in her condition meant a lot of things, but most of all it meant that someone could find out the truth when she had yet to provide a solution—hell she hadn't even accepted it herself.

"Really, usually you're the one who's packed three days before. Are you sure you're feeling well?" Andromeda pushed on the subject of health regarding her eldest sibling.

"Look, if you ask me one more time about being sick, I will hurt you." She threatened taking her book in both hands and making her way around Andromeda and up the stairs to her dorm.

Instead of leaving her alone, Andromeda bounded the stairs after her. "I'll help you pack."

"What if I don't want your help?"

"Well, you've got it. Now, come on." The brunette shrugged.

Bellatrix rolled her eyes and continued up the stairs ignoring Andromeda at her heels. She walked into the dorm and over to her bed, kicking off her shoes, and dropping the book with a loud "thud" to the ground. She felt numb, and part of her was still aching to cry; the last thing she wanted to do was pack, all she truly wanted was to lie down and fall into a deep sleep, forgetting everything, and everyone.

She lay down on her back, folding her hands over her stomach to hide what she was afraid of everyone seeing: a protruding bump (even though she had yet to truly gain any weight, maybe five pounds at the most), and closed her eyes.

"Bell!" Andromeda interjected as soon as Bella's eyelids shut. "Come on. I'm not going to be late for the train because I am waiting on you tomorrow. I know you ride with Rodolphus, but mum—"

At the mention of Rod's name Bella immediately sat up, her black curls whirling about her face as she did so. "No. I won't."

"Won't what?" Andromeda questioned as she reached under the bed and grabbed a large emerald green trunk adorned with the initials B.B and walked towards the dresser that sat next to the bed. "Be sitting with Rod?" She continued as she opened a drawer and begun to pull random articles of clothing from it.

Agitated and yearning to change the subject, Bellatrix slid across her bed and over to where he sister stood, sorting her things. "Give me those!" She yelled snatching a plaid, school skirt and bra from Andromeda. "If you _must_ annoy me, please be useful when you're doing so. You don't rumple things into a trunk; you fold them, neatly." She barked, taking the items in her hands and looking them over; a twinge of remembrance panning her thoughts.

She stared at the bra curiously, turning it over in her hands. Was it the one she wore that night? Was it the bra she had been wearing when everything became one big mess? Her eyes were fixated on the garment as she tried to push the silly thoughts from her head. What good would it do to harp about a bra_ now_? But, for some reason, as she held the material between her fingers, she could not help but let a few tears all from her eyes.

Andromeda seemed oblivious to her sister's internal struggle as she continued to babble on folding random clothes. "Okay, Now I _know _something is seriously wrong." She laughed still oblivious to Bella who had turned away from her. "You fold cloths? You don't do anything domestic what-so-ever; especially fold clothes, 'it's the elves jobs'. Bella…Bell…?"

Bellatrix hadn't listened to a word her sister was going on about. All that ran through her mind at the moment was the fact that something, a child—no a mistake—was growing inside of her, and how she could possibly fix it.

"Bella, are you paying any attention to what I'm saying?" Andromeda asked, setting the blouse in her hand down and taking a step back so that she could see her sister's face. "Are you crying?" She noted as the tears slipped down Bellatrix's cheek. "You are! Oh, Merlin. Sit, sit down, now. "Andromeda ushered her to the bed and used the sleeve of her robes to wipe away oncoming tears.

"Andy, just leave me alone."

"Bellatrix, I'm not going to leave you alone. You're crying."

"_No, really? I hadn't a clue_. Now leave!" Sarcasm slithered through her speech followed by anger.

"Is this because of Rodolphus? Did you two break up?" Andromeda questioned, ignoring her demands.

At the mere mention of Rod's name tears began to slip harder from Bella's eyes as she pushed Andromeda's hands from her eyes, and turned her head. "No…I don't know, now leave." She was flustered, hot, and just wanted to be left alone; her hands were shaking and she still felt a tinge of nausea. "Andromeda, get out!"

"No, Bella. I'm not Narcissa; you don't scare me." Andromeda folded her arms across her chest and took a deep breath in. "I just want to help you, Bella. Something is upsetting you, something big. Now, please. I'm not going to let you push me out."

"Will you just shut up? I need you to get out and leave me alone!"

"NO!"

"YES!" Hysterically, she screamed.

"NO, I'm not leaving you to cry yourself asleep like last night!"

A few of the girls who Bella shared her room with all turned to stare at the heated argument taking place.

"If you all don't turn around and quit putting your noses where they do not belong, I will hex you!" Bella screamed at them throwing herself onto her bed and waving the curtains shut leaving Andromeda on the other side.

Not easily deterred, Andy parted the curtains and sat down on the edge of the, running her hand down Bella's long black curls, trying to comfort her.

"Will you please leave? Get out. Just go."

"No!"

"Andromeda, please!"

"You're hiding something from me, Bella. I'm not leaving until you admit it!"

Bella turned on her side, biting her bottom lip as the tears continued down her face. "If you love me at all, Andromeda, Dromeda, you'd leave this alone. You wouldn't push. Please, just leave me alone. Pretend that you never saw anything."

"It's not that simple for me, Bella. You're in pain and it's killing me. I don't like to see either of my sisters hurting." Andromeda whispered, craning over to pull Bella's dark curls from her face and rubbing her back gently. "You can tell me everything and anything, love."

"No, I can't. Not this." Bellatrix's tear soaked voice became eerily calm as she starred out into space not even bothering to push Andromeda away, which scared the younger sibling even more.

"I know, Bells, what it's like to hold something—a secret—so tightly inside that you feel like exploding. You don't know who to trust and you're afraid of being exposed, losing everything; afraid no one will look at you the same if they found out." Andromeda continued on as Bella noticed the conversation taking a turn in another direction. She felt as if they were no longer just discussing her, but Andy as well.

"Andromeda," Bella spoke, turning around to peer at Andy through her dark curls, not bothering to pull them from her eyes. "Why do I feel like we aren't discussing me any longer? Are you hiding something?"

"I'm just trying to explain that I understand, Bella. I am not hiding a thing." Her voice grew unstable with every syllable she spoke.

"You're lying, aren't you?" Bella accused as she sat up starring straight into honey brown eyes. "What are you hiding?" she demanded to know as her big sister instincts kicked in.

"I'm not hiding a thing!" Andy protested as she looked away from her sister. "This isn't about me, either, so don't change the subject, Bella, what is wrong?"

"Really, Andromeda, you expect me to confess everything to you, but you yourself can't even be honest with me."

"I am being honest, Bella! Let me help you."Her expression was earnest, but her voice gave away a twinge of uncertainty.

"Get out." Retorted Bellatrix, unable to deal any longer; she was feeling well under the weather: downright sick. If this was going to be pregnancy, Bella knew that she would not last.

"Bells, please."

"I will not argue with you any longer. I said get out." Her voice hardened dripping with acid.

"But you've yet to pack." Andromeda pleaded looking for any excuse to stay.

"I don't care, now, leave."

"Fine! All I was trying to do was help!" Andy was close to tears.

"If you don't trust me enough to confess your secrets, then why should I trust you?" Bella stated, cold and flat; her voice signaling the end of the conversation.

Unwillingly to fight any longer, Andromeda stood, took one look at her older sister, and walked out.

An overwhelmed Bella threw herself down against her bed, pulled her pillow over her head, and shut her eyes; she spent the rest of the night waiving in and out of sleep.

.


	11. There's no Place like Home

**A/N: As I promised. Here it is. Enjoy. Bella is home, but now what? I can tell you what-but I won't. You'll have to read and find out.**

** Sneak Peek: For those who have been dying for Bella to tell Rodolphus: one of her sisters finds out first. I will tell you this much. Enjoy.**

**Thanks, Lia. Love! **

**Hannie, as always-for you! **

**Dark Bellatrix Black: I'll be updating that one too soon, promise. You are probably my favorite reviewer! **

**Everyone else who's continued to review: You are the reason I keep going. **

**Love, Review, ENJOY**

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**There's no Place like Home**

The morning the train arrived, Bella had managed to pack her things in haste. She grabbed only the essentials; anything else, she would be granted at home. She spent the train ride alone and reclusive; not willing nor wanting anyone's company, especially that of Rodolhpus (who had not tried to comfort her again) or her either of her sisters. The four-hour ride back into town consisted only of reviewing for her N.E.W.T.S but her thoughts would slip every now and then to the conundrum that lay ahead of her.

She still wasn't quite sure how she would deal with it, but she knew that truth was not an option. Every time she envisioned the truth, it ended with a subsequent upheaval of the Black family. She could picture her father raising his wand to Rodolphus, using the killing curse, no doubt; telling the ministry his daughter had been forced; she could see her mother pleading with her, demanding to know why she would do this to their family, why had she ruined the Black family name. Worst of all, though, she could see herself standing in front of an altar, hands clasped in Rod's, her huge stomach bulging beneath a white gown, pledging her life to him at the ripe age of sixteen. All of these images scared her to no end, some more than others.

Now, here she stood: barely six weeks pregnant (if she had calculated the date of conception, along with her missed menstruations correctly), outside of King's Cross, waiting for her mother. Her mind continued running idly through scenarios of how her mother would react to her. Her appearance hadn't changed very much in the last few weeks; she had put on a few pounds, but nothing drastic. Would Druella be able to tell right away?

Bellatrix was lost in her thoughts as she felt someone come to stand next to her; she turned, seeing Narcissa, who looked more than apprehensive about her standing so choice. Trying to lighten earlier tensions, and not having the energy to fight, Bellatrix smiled at her youngest sister and then hastily turned in the other direction. Descending the train platform was Rita Skeeter draped across a sullen looking Rodolphus' arms.

Rita appeared to be fawning all over Rod as her hands ran across his bandaged arms; his elbow still had yet to be healed. Madame Pomfrey had recommended a great healer by the name of Matilda Banglesh who was an expert at re-growing shattered bones and Rod was going to see her during the holiday. Rita's eyes immediately narrowed to slits, as Bellatrix turned to glare in their direction; Bella and Rod had fought—again—last night, but hadn't thought that they were over. The scene in front of her, however, now seemed to cement feelings of finality between them. Bella took a step in their direction; ready to give both of them a piece of her mind, but Andromeda stopped her with a tug on the arm.

"Bella, Mum is here," Andromeda whispered as she gently pulled her sister in the direction where their mother was coming from.

"I'm not daft, Andy! I can manage walking by myself." Bella retorted pulling her arm from her sister's grasp, picking up her luggage handle, and walking away.

Druella Rosier Black was a thin woman, around the same height as her eldest daughter, with golden long locks and bright blue eyes that matched those of Narcissa; her facial expression always haughty and her bone structure well defined. Most people were never sure how, exactly, to approach her. She was not cold, but she could be if pushed in that direction.

She smiled wide as she approached her three daughters. "Girls, come now. We have so much to do for the holiday preparations." Druella beckoned to her girls, who all stood apart from one another. Bella stood the farthest from others hoping that maybe, just maybe, Druella would not notice her.

Narcissa was the first to rush forward, smiling wide. "Mummy!" Bella could hear her call to their mother as she watched the matching blondes clasp hands. "The train ride was just awful!" Cissy continued, "Lucius Malfoy, the fifth year, picked on me the whole way home. He is so vile!" She declared in haste as their luggage was pulled from them and then, seemingly, disappeared into thin air. Bella knew better, however: the elves had come to get their luggage.

"Love," Druella cooed to her youngest, smiling as she did so. "You must really fancy Abraxas's boy, that's all I hear you talk about sometimes... Andromeda, Bellatrix, do well to keep up!"

Bella folded her arms across her chest and sighed with some relief as her mother walked ahead of her. Good thing, Bella thought, Mum didn't get too close, and, perhaps, she didn't notice... Bella turned to steal a glance in the train's direction. She could see Rodolphus waiting for his parents (Rita still hanging on him). He was watching her as she walked off. A part of her wanted to wave, smile, or go back and rush into his arms; but the other part of her did as she willed: rolled her eyes, turned, and continued on.

Before Bellatrix knew it, they were standing in the safe spot for apparition and portkeys. Her stomach soured as the portkey came into view. Would she be able to make it though without losing the contents of her stomach? She had been dizzy and nauseous for days. She was sure that both side-apparition and portkey would do her no good.

"Bella," Druella called as Bella starred down at the familiar silver-handled cup that lay before her. "I'll side apparate with Cissy, while you and Andy take the portkey."

Bella did not fuss. Instead, she shook her head, signaling "yes" and picked up the cup, waiting for Andromeda to grab the other end; once Andy did so, they both were jerked through a black hole. Bella could feel her body compress and her head began to spin; this wasn't good. The sisters landed, with a soft thud, on their feet in the Black Manor courtyard.

Immediately, Bella could feel the contents in her stomach rise to the surface; she was going to throw up. She took off running in the direction of the house as she felt the bile burn her throat; she was too slow, however, and she felt her body jerk as everything came rushing forward.

"Bella!" Andy called after her, apparently startled by her sister's sudden reaction; closely behind her were Narcissa and Druella, who had just landed.

Bellatrix hunched over a rose bush, her stomach wrenching, as she felt hot and sweaty. Andy bent down to comfort her, but Bella pushed her away. "Leave…." She broke off; more fluids amassed from her mouth as Andy wrinkled her nose.

"Andromeda, move aside so that I can tend to your sister." Druella called out as Bella's posture stiffened. Surely this incident would be a dead giveaway of her pregnancy. "Bella, Love…" Druella's soft, matronly voice called to her. "Are you feeling alright?"

"Mum, she has been under the weather lately," Andromeda interceded before Bellatrix had a chance to speak. "She was throwing up at school as well." Bella let out a grunt of disapproval followed by a glare as she inched back from her mother.

"Why didn't you owl to tell me, Bellatrix? I swear sometimes you can be so hard headed." Druella shook her head in disdain. "What if you had come down with Spattergoit or something? ... Twiggy!" A large pop lit the air and Twiggy, one of the many Black house elves, appeared.

"Yes, Mistress." The stubby creature spoke, bending low upon knee, ready to do her bidding.

"Prepare Bella some ginger tea along with some dry toast, clean this mess up, and ask Master Black to come here."

"Mum!" Bella pleaded, not wanting to be touched by anyone, let alone her father. She feared if too many people got too close to her they'd discover her secret. "I don't need daddy to pick me up, I can stand just fine. I'm okay. I just got dizzy from the portkey. I'm sorry."

"Nonsense, Bella. According to Andy you've been sick for a couple of days now, let me help you."

"Andromeda does not know what she is talking about. I'm fine, now please, just give me some air." Bella pleaded as the house elf disappeared, against Bella's pleas, with a loud pop. "Daddy isn't even home."

"It's Saturday, Bella. The department of Mysteries is not open. Now, don't be silly, let your father carry you into the house. I don't need you coming down with another dizzy spell and ruin another rose bush."

Suddenly, Cygnus Black appeared with a loud crack. "Druella, dear what is it? I have an important letter to…Bellatrix, what are you doing on the ground? Get up this instance!" His voice broke off as he saw Bellatrix sitting against the ground, a nose-rotting stench rising up.

"Daddy, I've tried. Mum won't let me." Bella started, but Druella cut her off.

"She's sick, Dear, probably the Spout Flu. I'll call for a healer later, but I need some helping getting her into the house. I didn't want to take the chance of levitating her and her getting sick again; I like my rose bushes."

Bellatrix felt humiliated as she sat upon the cold, wet, ground. She was still dizzy and was sure that if a healer were called she'd be found out at once; she pulled her cloak closer, the cold chilling her bones.

"Oh, alright. Girls…" scoffed Cygnus as he leaned over slipping one arm under Bella's legs and using the other to support her back. "Bella, how much have you been eating?" He asked, almost-teasingly as he struggled with her extra weight for a moment.

"Oh, Cygnus, she's a growing girl. Leave her be."

Growing…Bella thought as she shifted in his arms, wanting desperately to break out in tears. She threw a dangerous glare in Andromeda's direction.

"Exactly my point: a growing girl. If she continues to put on weight, what respectable pureblood man would want her? Merlin knows that Rodolphus Lestrange is far from a good choice; I've heard things about him, Druella." He continued on as they reached the inside of the manor. Cygnus carried her through the drawing room, into the foyer, and up the side stairs to her room.

He set her down on the grand bed, dressed in an emerald bedspread, said nothing to her and walked out. Little conversation was ever shared between Bellatrix and her father, for Cygnus dismissed her hard-headed tendencies as insolence. He could not see how bad she actually craved for his attention; using any means necessary to gain it.

She lay down against the bed, starring up into her bewitched ceiling to see a shooting star crossing the night sky. She turned over, seeing that her luggage had been brought up to her room. Wearily, (she was still feeling a bit off), she got down off her bed and headed towards her trunk.

She opened it to see her potions book lying hastily on the top of some clothes. She picked it up and made her way back to her bed, just in time to hear a knock on her already opened door. It was Druella, followed by Twiggy, who carried a silver tray in hand.

"Bellatrix," Druella called out. "Don't unpack, that's why we have elves. Twiggy…"

"Yes, Mistress. Twiggy will see to it that Miss Bella's things are unpacked at once." The elf jeered happily to serve his master. He scurried over to Bella, handed her the tea and plate.

Bella set her book down and took the tray from the elf. She was neither hungry, nor thirsty, but did so to appease her mother.  
"Drink up, Bellatrix. I'll need you well over this holiday. We have a lot to do before Christmas. We're having a dinner party, and I'll need your help."

"Isn't that why we have elves, Mum?" She questioned with disdain, wrinkling her nose as the tea hit her throat; it was disgusting.  
"Of course we have elves, but other things need to be attended to as well. Monday, I am taking you, Andromeda, and Narcissa shopping for new dresses. I've already given your measurements to Madame Ree. She expects us there early; she's pulled some samples for you all to try on. After that, we must find presents for Sirius and Regulus; and, if you're buying something for Rodlophus, we will do so..." She continued on, but Bellatrix was not paying much attention; her stomach still upset.

"Now relax for a bit while I go owl a healer." Druella finished, dismissively.

"Mum, I do not need a healer." Bella protested, her hands beginning to shake.

"I need you well, Bella, for the holidays."

"My catharsis exactly, Mum. What if you call a healer and she tells me that I have to be on bed rest? Who will help you for the holidays then? Narcissa? I think not. Besides, a healer is a waste of galleons when I am perfectly fine. I was turned upside down by the portkey, that's all; my sickness at school was due to improperly prepared food." Bellatrix pouted, praying to Merlin that her anxiety wasn't showing through. A healer would ruin everything, including the plans she had yet to form in regards to her child.

"Galleons aren't the issue, Bella. We have more than enough of those. I just want to make sure you're well. You are a bit pale, and Daddy was right about the weight."

"Now I'm fat?" Bella groaned defensively.

"I didn't say that! Your clothes are just a little snug; that's all. Look, I haven't time to argue with you today, Bella. Drink your tea, eat your toast, take a nap, and, if you don't feel better after that, I'm calling Madame Delores."

As they continued to talk- well, argue -Twiggy scurried about the room tidying it up and putting things back in their place; including Bella's trunk and its contents.

"I will feel better. I was just dizzy and I had an empty stomach. Your meddlesome daughter just became a bit over zealous; Andy forgets I am the oldest."

"Bella, do well to mind your sisters. As you said, you are the oldest, so act like it." With that, Druella stood and headed towards the door, walking out.

"Mind them?" Bella muttered angrily when her mother finally left. She turned to the elf. "Twiggy, close my door when you leave."

"Miss," Twiggy called, bowing low to Bellatrix. Bella handed him the silver tray of half-eaten toast and cold tea. He then hurried off with it, closing the door behind him.

Silence surrounded Bella as she lowered herself down against the bed and gazed up into the charmed ceiling, seeing the night sky. It was late afternoon, but Bella could not help but to feel exhausted. It was feeling that had become all-too-frequent as of late and she did not understand why. Yes, she had cried herself to sleep for the past three days, but that wouldn't really make her this tired. Would it? She felt like she had been hit by the Night Bus or something.

For a while, Bella just lay on her back, starring aimlessly; her eyes opening and closing as she felt tired beyond belief. She tried to will herself awake in hopes of getting out of bed, but to no avail. She felt time was drawing near; and soon, everyone would know what she had done: her stomach showing like a scarlet letter.


	12. Mother, May I?

A/N: Hello everyone...it's I, Riss313. I just changed my name, promise. So...it's been a while (Dodges evil glares, and angry glances). I'm sooo sorry, but this year has been hectic for me. I'm a college student, second year, and I'm going insane. I want to push my astronomy prof off a tower. Hope that communicates my scholastic frustrations. Lol. Anywho-it's been three months. I'm picking back up now, tho. Promise. I have the next two chapters written, all I need to do is edit and do some rewrites. Forgive me.

Thanks goes to Lia aka Jacalyn Hyde, for being her wonderful self and Beta-ing.

As always: For you Hannie.

Everyone else: Thank you for being patient and not killing me.

Okay, as someone so kindly pointed out: this is the right chapter Content, but the wrong version. I apologize for all the craptastic mistakes. Please forgive me.

* * *

Mother, May I

Bella awoke to find herself facedown in her oversized potions book. The page was bent and stuck to her face as she pulled back from it, wondering what time it was. She figured, from the sound and look of things, that it was late. Druella hadn't called the healer after all; she'd let Bella sleep, which was exactly what Bella needed. Sleep meant she could ignore everything and everyone for a while.

Her stomach rumbled as she sat up, running her hands through her matted curls, and then rubbing her eyes. She was still in her clothes from the train; the only thing she had removed was her cloak. Sighing, she threw her feet over the edge of her bed and stood up, stretching. Her room had a large bay window which over looked the terrace; through her sheer curtains, which hung over its doors she could see the night sky: pitch black.

Again, her stomach rumbled. She hadn't had anything at all that day except for a bite of toast and a sip of tea; she was starving. Her mind, unlike her body though, was numb towards its recent news. Bella couldn't even fathom that she had just destroyed her life; her mind wouldn't let her, yet her body wouldn't let her forget, for it was demanding nutrients (no doubt to take on its new duty of housing two people).

Her feet landed on the carpet with a slight thud, she stood and walked over to the dresser, pulling out random clothes until she came across her nightgown. She slipped her current attire down her pale skin and pulled the silk nightgown down over her thin frame.

Once more, her stomach rumbled as she smoothed the silk over her body, opting to not brush her hair as she walked towards her door. She stopped as she reached her vanity floor length mirror and paused at her reflection.

Her skin was a lot paler than normal, her hair was not brushed, and she looked like she hadn't slept in months. Bella sighed as she straightened in posture and pushed her stomach out, silently wondering what she would look like carrying a bludger around under her nightgown. Once again her stomach rumbled, beckoning her out of her room and to the hall.

Bella took the back steps leading to their very large kitchen (it was big enough for a house of thirty not five). The kitchen light was off.

"Twiggy..." She called as she reached the doorway, searching for the familiar faint pop of her favorite elf (she'd never tell it that though, for it would think it deserved special treatment, she was a witch and Twiggy was an elf, it had to know its place).

Suddenly, the little stubby figure of Twiggy appeared before her, bowing low and smiling.

"Missus is out of bed late, what can Twiggy do for you?"

"I'm starving, will you fetch me..."she paused for a moment thinking of what exactly she'd like to eat. Her body was craving all types of different things as of late, which she was not used to at all. Right now, she decided on: "a simple glass of milk and some molasses cookies—no make that chocolate chip...actually bring me both."

"Missus would not like dinner, Black Bean Soup, Miss Bella. Twiggy will warm it, just for you."

"No. I want cookies, now!" Bella snapped harsher than she had intended, but fresh cookies sounded amazing to her right now; especially their ingredients of cinnamon and chocolate.

"Bellatrix, do you think it wise to eat this late at night?" A familiar voice sounded as the kitchen light popped on. It was Druella, who sat at the large marble island in the center of the kitchen.

Taken-a-back, Bella blinked a few times before acknowledging her presence and speaking. She thought she was the only one awake at this time. "Mum! You gave me a fright! What are you doing up at this time; and in the dark?"

"Ah, Bella some day you'll realize that some things are clearer when comforted by absolute darkness."

Bella nodded her head in half agreement, if she could just sit in the darkness forever...or at least the next seven to eight months..."Things?"

"Yes, things; now why are you up so late?" The look on Druella's face was one of solemnity and Bella could've sworn she had been crying. "I thought you didn't feel well, which is why I let you sleep instead of calling the healer, but if you need her now..."

"No Mum!" She shouted out loud without thinking; she gapped a hand over her mouth. "I meant, I'm fine; just wanted a snack, that's all."

"You shouldn't be eating cookies at this time of night—well morning, love. Are you still feeling bad?" Druella questioned as she waved her waved her wand in air beckoning a chair out towards Bella.

A crack splintered the air and Twiggy appeared with a platter of cookies, a glass of milk and a cup of water, along with a bowl of fresh fruit.

"Twiggy brought Miss Bella her cookies, along with fruit for Mistress."

"You're dismissed now, Twiggy. You may treat yourself to the left over dinner from tonight. You are not permitted to share with any of the other elves." Druella spoke as she took a strawberry from the fruit pile.

Tears swelled in the elf's eyes as it bowed lower than humanly possible and dashed off.

Ignoring the scene occurring in front of her, Bella snatched two cookies from the plate and devoured them within seconds; then grabbed the glass off the table and took a large gulp. She was so hungry; she felt as if it had been days since her last meal.

"Bellatrix!" Druella screeched, appalled.

Bella was in the process of shoving another cookie down her throat when her mother's screech; she set the cookie back down on the plate.

"What, mother?" She pouted, looking quite upset. She was starving, literally. She sighed pulling the strap of her nightgown back up as it slipped down her shoulder.

"You're eating like I haven't taught you any manners, positively barbaric! Please do have some self containment."

Bella rolled her eyes and groaned; it was roughly three o'clock in the morning and her mother was worried about manners, of course; and they wondered why she was always moody, rules like these were ridiculous. Who was looking at her at three o'clock in the morning? Why should she remain demure?

"I'm hungry; I'm not eating for anyone to watch me, or for anyone else!" _That's a lie_...Her mind hissed as her stomach roared. She was tempted to place a shaky hand against her stomach to detect movement but stopped herself. She had to remain numb.

"Why must you always pick at me, Mum?" She demanded to know, hastily searching for a quick change of subject.

"Pick at you? Bella, I do no such thing, now don't slouch!" Druella demanded as Bella inched down in her chair reaching for another cookie. "You don't need another cookie, either. Cygn—your father was a bit right about that weight. Your face is a little chunkier."

"See, you're doing it again! Mum!"

"I'm not picking, Bella, I'm just telling things that you wouldn't want someone else to tell you for fear of embarrassment. I did not raise barn animals. You're the ol-"

"I'm the oldest: it's my job to set the example for everyone else. I know this, Mum. I have two sisters; I should do well to mind them." She mocked Druella's tone of voice as her stomach flopped over again. No more hesitation, she snatched a cookie from the plate and ate, refusing to listen to Druella's rebuttal.

"Bella, must you always be so...difficult? So much like your father, I swear."

She tensed at the mention of Cygnus. "I am nothing like him. He doesn't even like me."

Druella shook her head, pushing the bowl of fruit away from her and folding her hands in her lap. "That's not true; you two are more alike then you shall ever know."

"Then why doesn't he ever say one word to me unless he's yelling about Rod, or demanding that I act like a 'young lady'; telling me that I should stay in my place. What even is my place?" The frustration was clearly apparent in Bella's voice as she spoke.

"You're place, Bella, right now is in a child's. You listen to your father and I. Next year however, you will be seventeen and then soon, you'll graduate. After that, we will find you a suitable husband."

"Selling me off when I'm off age, then? Thank you, but I will not consent. I won't become a housewife; I refuse to. You're absolutely miserable. I don't want to be that way. Rodolphus and I co-exist without marriage, why should we ever marry?"

"Miserable...Bella whatever gave you the idea that I was miserable? I'm not...and what do you mean 'co-exist.' You're sixteen; he's your first boyfriend. "

"Mum, can I ask you a few questions-without you picking at me-_please_." Bella asked hoping to gain some insight into a few things. She had to be careful though. Druella was not a 'dumb blonde' as most people would have thought which is why Bella never understood her decision to be a housewife. Bella would often hate dinner parties where she would watch men engage in civil and stimulating discussion whereas her mother, who knew more than those men most of the time, would sit idly with her mouth close; a curt nod or small smile every now and then. It disgusted Bella to watch her mother stoop so low and vowed never to do it herself.

"I won't pick if you stop insulting." Druella challenged raising her eyebrows then running a hand through her blonde hair.

"If you answer my questions honestly."

"Fine." She reached for her glass of water and put it to her lips.

"When did you first have..." Bella paused, her face flustered and red; she wasn't quite sure how to ask her question, but had to ask it. "...sex...with whom." She mumbled almost out of ear shot, but Druella had heard her, Bella could tell by the fact that Druella almost choked as she spit out the water she had just drank.

"Excuse me..." Druella questioned as she held a hand to her throat. "Who did I what? Bella..."

"Sex, mother; don't give me that look. Obviously you've done it; I wouldn't be sitting here if you hadn't..."

Druella's mouth was parted slightly as she stared at her daughter; no doubt lost for words from shock.

Immediately after the words fell from her mouth, Bella regretted them. She should've just let it go after her mother failed to hear her clearly the first time.

"Never mind, Mum; forget that I said anything." She reached for her glass of milk, taking a drink and reveling in its goodness. She'd been craving milk for a while.

"Why would you ask me something like that, Bella; I can't just forget it. You're 16 what business are my sexual experiences to you?"

"They aren't, I was..." Her stomach turned at the thought of her parents in a sexual situation. "Mum I just want to know when it's okay to..."She stopped mid-sentence, no longer able to look her mother in the eye; instead she turned her attention towards a one of her curls that insisted on falling into her eye site every five minutes. She twiddled it in between her fingers and then pulled back on it watching it bounce right back into place.

"Okay to what, Bellatrix?" Druella waited for her to finish her words, but Bella didn't. She remained silent, playing with her hair. "Bella?"

The room was silent as mother and daughter both tried not to stare at one another. Druella barely moved and Bella continued to play with her hair.

Bella broke the silence first, but still had yet to look in her mother's direction. "Did you get pregnant the first time you slept with dad?" Once again, she regretted her words, wishing she had a time turner handy.

"Bella..." Druella's voice was level, yet heavy with inquiry. "is there something you're trying to tell me in a round-about way, Bellatrix?" She raised an eyebrow. "Are you sleeping with Rodolphus?"

Frozen and unprepared for such a question, Bella replied with the best answer possible as she condemned herself for being so stupid. "MUM! NO!" She feigned a shocked expression of disgust, praying to Merlin that her mother couldn't see through her blatant lies. "You think I would be that daft, don't you? Of course you do." She went on the defensive. "I'm sorry that I can't be perfect Narcissa, or quiet little Andromeda. I try my best though. I'm glad to know what you really think of me. No doubt, Dad already thinks I'm a harlot. I guess you do too now."

Druella rolled her eyes. "A bit dramatic, aren't we? I was asking a simple question, Bella. You seem very interested in things of that nature at the moment and I want to know where these questions are stemming from. Are you and Rodolphus thinking of going down that road? If so Bella, know that you're a pureblood witch, not a half blood whore. A lady does not give herself away to anyone without the thought of marriage. "

"I'm not marrying, didn't we just have this conversation."

"But, if you're sleeping with—"

"Mum, I said that we weren't doing it. I was curious. I can't ask questions? Please, I'm tired. I'm going back to bed." Bella dismissed her mother's notions to pry, still unable to meet Druella's direct gaze, afraid that she'd see right through her.

"I—Bella."

Bella had been halfway out of the room, walking hurriedly as Druella called out to her. "Bella, I'm your mother, regardless of how much we argue you can ask or tell me anything. I love you, not any less than you sisters. "

Druella's words made Bella's heart lurch in her chest. She was still hungry, but could no longer comfortable being in the same room as her mother. She felt awful as she thought of the words that just slipped from Bella's mouth. You wouldn't understand...Bella thought as Druella told her that she could tell her anything she needed.

"Love you too, Mum. Goodnight."

With that, Bella walked out of the kitchen, taking the long way back to her room.


End file.
